5 Food Existentialism
The recent announcement that Doritos will soon manufacture Doritos Locos Taco flavored Doritos (take a moment to wrap your brain around that M.C. Escher painting of a snack), will undoubtedly make us all stop and think, “What does it all mean?” That is if this unfathomable food concoction doesn’t cause the very fabric of space and time to tear and wipe us all from existence. But for a treat that tasty and complex, it’s a risk we should all be willing to take.
4 Bridging the Gap
Look, everyone loves Doritos. That’s a scientific fact, and if you didn’t believe it before, the undeniable popularity of the Doritos Locos Tacos has proven it once and for all. It has also proven the massive potential these tacos have for solving many of the world’s conflicts. Regardless of age, sex, creed, race, religion, sexuality, foot size, or college basketball allegiance, we as a people can all come together over this astonishing hybrid treat. In fact, don’t be surprised if they serve them at the next UN Summit.
3 Flying Food Trucks
You all saw the commercial. When some remote town in Alaska found out that the news of a Taco Bell being built there were nothing but baseless rumors, they were heartbroken. So what did Taco Bell do in response? They had a food truck flown in by helicopter to hand out Doritos Locos Tacos to these poor, isolated American souls. It’s a truly great story and a testament to the tastiness of these tacos. It’s only sad if you think about all the hungry Canadians who had to watch the tacos pass them over.
2 Stoner Anonymity
Weed lovers rejoice, because now that the Doritos Locos Taco has brought the masses to Taco Bell, no longer will you be so easy to pinpoint. Before, it was safe to assume that the guy ordering 9 tacos, 3 chalupas, 2 burritos and a fiesta potato bowl was certainly high as a kite. But now, thanks to the mainstream success of the Doritos Tacos, that man carrying out 20 of them by himself might just be a well-informed consumer who knows what he likes.
1 The Snack/Meal Hybrid
No longer are the meal and the snack two entities completely independent of one another! Oh, what’s that mom? Doritos aren’t part of a proper dinner? Well they are now! The ingenious creation of the Doritos Locos Taco has opened a Pandora’s box full of delicious possibilities. Suddenly, a Twinkie-steak doesn’t sound quite so ridiculous, does it? Okay, well it does, but you get the point.