First Dates So Cringe They Make Single Life A Dream

Hit Or Miss
First dates can be extremely stressful. But sometimes, by the end of the date, you can tell that you and the other person have no future together. Experiencing strange, awkward, or weird first dates is a common occurrence. During these dates, you often think of any and every excuse to leave.
A few Redditors have shared their worst first date stories and we are all ears. Some of these stories are so bad that they had no other option but to get out of there, immediately. Let’s see what happened.
He Had A Ring

New York Post
Mine didn’t even turn into a date. I bowled on a team once a week and chatted with a guy that came in the same nights with his family. We finally made a date, and as soon as I got in his car, he did something I could have never expected.
He asked me to marry him! He pulled a ring out of the glove compartment and said he was in the navy and was scheduled to be relocated to Germany in two weeks. I doubted for a minute, but eventually, I gave him a response.
I was shocked and scared, told him he was nice and I would write to him, but it was just weird, I never heard from him again.
Story credit: Reddit / Xxfoxontherun
The Real Reason

The Independent
On the 4th date, she tells me the real reason she changed jobs. She used to be a prison guard and had cancer, so all the medical stuff forced a change of work. Now she works as a nurse. This is important.
She tells me in a totally casual way that because of having cancer, she felt like she needed to let go and be spontaneous. So she started dating 2 prisoners that were there. She used to smuggle them in cell phones and other stuff. Asked her how out of pure morbid curiosity.
She said, “women have natural pockets that fit lots of stuff.” Then tells me she was caught because someone walked in on them having sex in his cell, and the other inmate she was dating got jealous and turned them in. She said the reason she wasn’t in jail was that the psychologist testified she was in an altered mental state because of cancer. And right then, I knew what to do.
She went to the bathroom, and I promptly ran like hell. She called me every day for 2 weeks before giving up.
Story credit: Reddit / Radiolotek
Ruined His Car

Public Domain
I ditched the date at the bar we were at after she told me she got mad at her ex over basically nothing and then proceeded to ruin his mint classic car. But there was more.
She also casually mentioned being arrested over something else related to aggressive behavior – I would have remembered what she did had I not checked out right then and there, faked going to the restroom, then promptly paid my tab and left.
Why would you think that that’s even a thing to tell someone on a first date?
Story credit: Reddit / RestlessSubjective
She Wouldn’t Stop Texting

Man of Many
We met outside of one of my favorite restaurants. She was texting on her phone, shook my hand, and barely looked up. We get seated, all the while still on her phone texting. So I asked her normal date things to only get “yeahs” and eventually a “hold on a second” after my 3rd attempt at striking up any sort of conversation. What the heck was that?
So I asked if everything was OK. After the “hold on a second” comment, I figured something bad might’ve happened. She responded by saying her friends are a priority. I didn’t know what to say.
I was kind of taken back, our waitress walks up right after that, and she cuts her off as she’s greeting us with a huffy “finally!” Then she barks her drink order at her as rudely as possible and goes right back to her phone. Right then, I decided that enough was enough.
I asked for water, said “excuse me,” and got up after a minute of silence. I found the waitress, gave her a 20, said I was leaving, and apologized. Quickest date of my life. All in 10-15 minutes max. I’ve never met anyone close to that rude on a date.
I always tell myself I got all my bad dates in one. Here’s to hoping that’s true!!
Story credit: Reddit / Anonymous
Fan Of Feet

Medical News Today
A guy from the gym asked me out for coffee. We hit it off and walk to the beach afterward. We sit on a wall watching the ocean, and he tells me he gives amazing foot rubs and insists on giving me one. For some reason, I accept.
Takes off my flip flop and is really into my feet. Toes go into his mouth, and I noped out.
Story credit: Reddit / Sk8trGrl21
Two Beers

Napoleon Dynamite
We were on our second date. He bought me two beers. A slow song was playing, and he wanted to slow dance. As soon as we hit the floor, he tried to shove his tongue down my throat. I said I just wanted to dance and talk, get to know each other. His response?
“Well, I just bought you two beers” I walked off the dance floor, put cash on the table to cover my beers, and walked out the door. Yuk.
Story credit: Reddit / rackfocus
Didn’t Get Far

Public Domain
Didn’t even get as far as the date. I met a girl at a table quiz in a pub on the weekend. She was a friend of my cousin who I was there to fill out a team with. Me and her swapped numbers and got talking during the week. I asked her on a date for coffee, scheduled for Saturday. And check what happened next.
On Friday, she told me that if I loved her and wanted this relationship to work, I should bring her on holidays and to hotels. I told her I wasn’t going to be meeting her for coffee the following day, and I haven’t seen her since.
Story credit: Reddit / Too-many-Bees
Didn’t Notice

Public Domain
She showed up late. Spoke in one-word answers. Stared at her phone and texted other people. Yelled at the waiter for filling her water too much.
I finished my food. Placed a $20 on the table. Walked out. Then blocked her on my phone. I don’t think she even noticed, but I was her ride home.
Story credit: Reddit / IWearBones138
Had To Change For Her

Luulla
Went out with a woman I met on a website. I didn’t have glasses on in the photos because of the glare, but I fully disclosed that I was blind as a bat. I was also clean-shaven in the pictures. Well, that would turn out to be a problem.
Within 10 minutes of meeting, she started in on how if I wanted to continue to see her, I’d need to get contacts and shave off the 5 o’clock shadow.
Story credit: Reddit / Allegiance86
Missionary

HuffPost
Apparently, he catfishes atheist and agnostic people on dating sites to try to convert them over a meal. I made it until the apps hit the table.
Then I excused myself, asked the waiter to wrap up my dinner and leave it at the bar, and gave him enough to cover more than half the bill + tip. I let my date know I was done/leaving and waited at the bar for my dinner to go. He left shortly after that. The bartender and waiter comped my check after hearing the story.
Story credit: Reddit / RachelSid
Pool Fun

It’s 2 am. he took me to a little decorative pool/pond in front of a museum. It was not even a foot deep. He tried too hard to “be spontaneous,” urging us to get in it.
He took off his pants and got in, thinking it would prompt me to get in too. No.
During all his begging, I requested an Uber, which happened to be around the corner. I left him there in that stupid pond.
Story credit: Reddit / 18-F-CA
Clueless

Public Domain
It was the first date, she showed up 45 minutes late because she couldn’t find the place. She barely contributed anything to the conversation. Then we decided to drive over to another place, literally a five-minute car ride away, and she got lost on the way there too.
She had a functional GPS, the same one that I was using that navigated me there perfectly. And these were not hidden locations; they were well-signposted national parks. That’s when I realized something.
That was the day I learned that a certain level of incompetence is a giant turn-off for me. I was sitting on a rock for about 30 minutes before I just texted her: “I’m going to just go grab some lunch, thanks.”
Story credit: Reddit / elpumaman
Karaoke Date

FAIL Blog/Cheezburger
We talked for a few days before going on a date. I told him that one, I’m pretty low-key and don’t like being the center of attention, and two, I hate karaoke with every fiber of my being. So he decided to surprise me by taking me to a karaoke bar.
He said he wanted to push me out of my comfort zone and expand my horizons. Then he signed me up to sing. I walked out as soon as the guy called my name. I’ll expand my own horizons, thank you very much.
Story credit: Reddit / Haceldama
Woe Is Me

Public Domain
We met at a P.F. Changs. She was 20-minutes late without any attempt to communicate that she would be late. After introducing myself, she spoke non-stop for the next 15-ish minutes. She covered such topics as her horrible family, her horrible job, and her horrible ex-bf.
I threw money on the table and walked out. Didn’t offer an explanation. Just bounced. She screamed some unintelligible stuff at me while I walked out. Blocked her number. Fin.
Story credit: Reddit / NopeNotThatGuy