I Wanted Kids And Didn’t Find A Partner, So I Became A Single Mom

What A Journey

I can not tell you how relieved I was when it was finally over. All the hassle, all the stress, it was finally a thing of the past. Or so I thought.

The day he officially became mine, I got a frantic call from his biological mother. She had just discovered that she was pregnant again. And she wanted me to take the baby.

It Started Four Years Ago

Four years ago, I was in a loving relationship with my high school sweetheart. We had just left school, and we had so many plans for our future.

But sadly, none of those plans came to fruition. And what happened between us had me reevaluating my entire life. It made me realize that the time had come for me to make a very serious decision, and I didn’t know if I was ready for that.

We Had So Many Plans

When we moved in together, we started planning our future as the couple we always wanted to be. We spoke about getting married and starting a family.

Little did I know that those things were just words to him. He had other plans, secrets that would ultimately lead to our demise and my decision to adopt.

He Ruined Everything

Jake ruined everything we had planned. It didn’t take long for me to find out that he was cheating on me with one of his colleagues, and he had sold her everything he was trying to sell me.

So, in a fit of rage, I kicked him out of my house and swore never to love another. But that left me with a massive problem.

What Was I Going To Do?

Once I started calming down, I realized that all my plans for the future had just gone up in smoke. I was in no mood to get into another relationship.

But I had always wanted to have a child, a family of my own, and it wasn’t like I could do it alone. What was I going to do? Should I just give up on my dreams and move on?

It Was All I Wanted

I thought about it for hours and realized that this was a dream I couldn’t give up on. I was an only child, and my dream to be a mother started when I was very young.

It was the one thing I always aimed for. The one goal that had been in the back of my mind my entire life. I couldn’t just let it go. There were other ways to go about the situation.

How Could I Make It Happen?

After a few days, I sat down and thought about all the options that were available to me. A single woman could always go for something like IVF, and I wasn’t the type of person who would turn down adoption.

But each of these things had its downsides, which meant that I had a lot to consider.

Looking Into My Options

IVF would be a massive problem for me. I had just started my first actual job and couldn’t take three months off to give birth and be with my baby. Plus, it cost far more than I could ever afford.

That left me with only one other option-adoption. But that had problems of its own. Problems I would only learn about further down the line.

Fostering

Adoption also came with two options. I could either become a foster parent. Or I could go with open adoption. I didn’t really know which one would be best for me.

When it came to being a foster parent, there were a few downsides. What if the parents wanted their children back? And what if there were no babies available?

Open Adoption

With open adoption, I could get a baby, which was something I really wanted. It’s not like I have a problem with taking care of a four-year-old. But I wanted to experience the journey from the beginning.

What I didn’t know was that open adoption was a very long and difficult process, especially for a young, single woman.

Endless Research

I spent the next few weeks researching the two options that were available to me. And that was when I started realizing that things weren’t as easy as they seemed.

People were going on and on about how hard it was for a single person to adopt. But that didn’t mean I would be giving up. This was something worth fighting for.

My Mind Was Made Up

After reading through countless websites and attending a few classes regarding the process, my mind was made up. I decided to go with open adoption.

It was a better option for me, and it could help fulfill my wants and needs. But that was where the difficult part of the process began. That was when I realized that what the people said was right.

No Easy Feat

The adoption process was nothing to be laughed at, especially when it came to a single person. Sure, I was earning enough to take care of myself and the baby. But the decision wasn’t up to me.

That was the first thing my caseworker warned me about. But at the time, I didn’t believe her. I’d learn my lesson soon enough.

Tons Of Paperwork

My journey started with a ton of paperwork. I had to fill in one form after another, and once those were submitted, I received even more.

I had to submit all my financial details. They conducted an entire search into my history. And I needed to arrange a police clearance certificate to prove that I didn’t have a criminal record.

Nerve-Wracking Meetings

But that was just the beginning. After months of filling in papers and exposing my entire life to random strangers, I had to pass one more test.

I scrubbed and cleaned, ensuring that my house was spotless by the time my caseworker arrived. If she didn’t approve this, I’d lose any chance I ever had. But I had no idea what she would be looking for.

The Wait Began

Luckily, the house inspection was approved. I passed every single test that they threw my way, but that didn’t mean I would get a baby.

That was when the wait began, and it was an endless one. Every time someone popped up, I was contacted and agreed to have my information passed on. But there was yet another obstacle in my way.

I Was Incredibly Anxious

Every time my information was sent to a family, I anxiously waited for a response. And each time it came, I was terribly disappointed.

No one chose me, and I couldn’t help but wonder why that was. So I scheduled a meeting with my caseworker and asked her what it was that I was doing wrong. Her answer crushed me.

No One Wanted A Single Mom

The caseworker informed me that very few families were willing to accept a single parent that’s looking to adopt. They might not want their children, but they still want what’s best for them.

And many people believe that single-parent households aren’t the best way to go. That’s why so many of them turned me down.

A Call Came In

After that discussion, I felt defeated. I thought that I’d never be picked by a family that was looking to put their child up for adoption.

But a few weeks later, I received a call from my caseworker. She had shown my profile to a woman who wanted to put her baby up for adoption, and she ended up picking me.

It Seemed Solid

My heart raced against the walls of my chest as I listened to my caseworker speak. After the selection process, she actually had a talk with the mother to confirm that this was what she wanted.

Everything seemed perfect, so my details were given to her. And the next day, we spent over an hour talking about what was going to happen.

We Met

After ensuring that this was what she wanted, I flew From Seattle to LA to meet the mother of my future child.

I stayed close to her for a week, and during that time, we worked together to ensure that everything would go smoothly. She told me about her hopes for the future and the reasons for her giving the baby up.

A Done Deal

I even went with her when she got an ultrasound, and I saw the baby for the first time. It seemed like a done deal to me. But then something terrible happened.

The mom was due to give birth in one month, and she had invited me to join her in the hospital. I immediately started making plans, but I soon discovered that I had made a massive mistake.

She Just Vanished

After I arrived home, I stayed in contact with the mom. And about a week before she was supposed to go into labor, I tried to call her to confirm our plans.

But there was no answer. I called multiple times and even sent a few texts, but I never heard from the woman again. Had she changed her mind?

We Tried Everything

After several failed attempts, I contacted my caseworker and told her what had happened. She tried to call the mom herself to find out what was going on, but she got the same response.

The due date came and went, but neither of us ever heard back from the woman whose child I was supposed to adopt.

The Wait Began Again

That was when the dreaded wait began once more. My profile was sent to several more families, but once again, I kept on being denied.

Years had passed. I was now a 25-year-old with a stable career and an even better salary. I bought the home I lived in, and my life was flourishing. But one thing was still missing.

I Almost Gave Up

After so many years and over 20 refusals, I was starting to lose hope. Each refusal hurt me more than the last, and I was really starting to consider giving up.

t seemed like I would never get the baby I always wanted. And the time had come for me to admit defeat. But then something happened that would change my entire outlook.

A Missed Call

I was working late one night, and just as I finished, I saw that there was a missed call from my caseworker.

Sinking down in my chair, I decided to call her back, hoping that someone was willing to give me a chance. I knew that it would be my last chance, and I just wasn’t ready to give up yet.

I Was Shocked

My caseworker let out a sigh of relief as she answered the phone, and that was when I realized that someone had picked me.

She gave me all the details, and I realized just how much trouble I was actually in. The woman was due any day, so I could have a baby before I knew it.

A Week Later

I met the mother, and we had an instant connection. So when she gave birth a week later, she immediately called me and told me to come to the hospital.

I was in a state of shock as I jumped out of bed and rushed to the hospital. The time had finally come. I was about to be a mother.

Just The Beginning

But things weren’t as easy as they seemed. My son, Jake, was born with some serious complications because his birth mother was an addict.

He was underweight and severely malnourished, meaning he’d have to spend the next few weeks, if not months, in intensive care. But I was right by his side the entire time, and because of that, his mom had another surprise in store for me.

In order to protect the privacy of those depicted, some names, locations, and identifying characteristics have been changed and are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblances to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, are entirely coincidental.