Doctor appointments can be extremely awkward sometimes. When the person’s job is to look at different parts of your body, embarrassment is sure to follow. But when the doctor is of the opposite gender, it makes things even worse!
Some Redditors have shared their experiences with doctors of the opposite sex, and let’s just say, these stories are cringe and hilarious. Let’s take a look at some of the best ones.
Hop Or Cough?
So “my friend” was getting a physical before trying out for a sports team, I believe, and when he learned that it would include a prostate check, it all went downhill from there. The drama all started when the doctor who’s going to perform it walks and it turns out she’s a young, beautiful woman.
It’s already awkward enough. He sucks it up, and drops his pants. The doctor proceeds to do her bit and at the point where the doctor says “cough”, apparently my friend thought she said “hop.”
So here my friend is standing there, the doctor with her hand on his prostate, and my friend starts hopping on the spot like this.
Said it was the most embarrassing moment of his life.
Story Credit: Reddit/AdamVonHorn
Ripping Off The Tape
So I was got a vasectomy. I know, awkward enough already right? What I didn’t know is that you have to get your “stuff” taped to your stomach. A young female doctor came in to remove the tape after the procedure.
I’m guessing she was probably a student doctor so something because she was looking really nervous and uncomfortable. She’s kind of tentative and unsure about pulling the tape off, so I say: “Go ahead, it’s been through a lot in its time.” She got a big smile and ripped the tape off like a pro after that. So she’s totally cool in my book.
Story Credit: Reddit/GALACTICA-Actual
Family Medicine Rotation
It’s the third year of medical school, I’m on family medicine rotation which I’m doing on my med school’s campus academic health center. Patient is a pretty, young girl. During the exam, it comes to light she’s there for genital itching. My attending tells me she’ll let me do the pelvic if the patient consents. Lo and behold, she consents and I do the exam and I end up prescribing anti-fungal cream.
Two days later, I’m back on campus and come face to face with my patient who never mentioned she was also a student. We both couldn’t look eye to eye at first but ended up laughing it off. But that wasn’t the worst part.
She returns for a follow-up appointment. During the check-up, she goes “So when are you going to take me out to dinner?” I politely declined but man was it awkward. So yeah, I did a pelvic exam on a fellow medical student, who asked me on a date after.
Story Credit: Reddit/Doc_Fraktal
Just about to finish the night when an 18-year-old with abdominal pain comes in. Patient was a thin girl lying in bed in the fetal position, with her worried mum sitting nearby. I’m about to examine when she needed to go to the toilet. At this point, I’m thinking burst appendix.
Next thing I know the nurse shoves me into the bathroom. Before me, the girl bears down in a squat with a now noticeable baby bump repeating “don’t tell mum, don’t tell mum, don’t tell mum!”.
I throw her in a nearby bed and charge into the resus area leaving the mum in her cubicle. We successfully deliver a beautiful baby boy. Throughout this time the girl is begging us not to tell her mum while we keep saying “she drove you here, you can’t hide a baby!”.
We eventually convinced her to tell her mum. The look when I brought mum into the room was unlike anything I have ever seen: Anger mixed with concern mixed with joy mixed with confusion.
Craziest day of my life.
Story Credit: Reddit/MADTurnUP
No Gag Reflex
A fellow classmate in Medical School and I have mock exams, and various people will sign up to be patients. They get paid a decent amount. So he went into the mock exam room and started the basic history and physical on the patient who also happens to be a fairly attractive female.
Did this and that pretty standard stuff, then grabbed a tongue depressor and had her open her mouth. Then…nothing, he did it again, and said with bewilderment, “That is weird, you do not have a gag reflex.” She smiled and gave him a coy wink. He about lost it and couldn’t finish, he walks out and finds the preceptor who monitors the exam rolling on the floor laughing.
If it was me, I would have been on the floor too. Luckily it was a friend.
Story Credit: Reddit/Show_me_your_booty
Looking For Warts
So I have another one. It was my own experience this time. I was in my OB/GYN rotation and this young redhead came in for “warts” in an awkward area. Let’s just say the curtains matched the carpet and, pun intended, it was a bonfire. So my preceptor and I at the time were “looking” for warts.
We would find one, freeze it, find another, freeze it. I got lost in the moment and forgot where I was, as I was just a student, and had not yet fully developed professional composure. I saw one and said, “I found one, a big one too!” Realizing what I said I looked up as the patient looked down and we locked eyes.
The embarrassment in her eyes is something I will never forget. I wanted the ground to swallow me up.
Story Credit: Reddit/Show_me_your_booty
Not Who She Wanted To See
Somewhat related, but from a patient’s perspective. When I was in nursing school I went to my school’s student health center for a gyno appointment. The doctor asked me if it was alright if a medical student was present. I said that was fine. She then specifies that the student was male and asked me if that was still okay.
I wasn’t totally comfortable with that, but as a nursing student I knew how much it sucks when a patient refuses you, so I said yes. Lo and behold, it was an incredibly attractive med student from my school who I knew.
He got to see “all of me” and I never could look him in the eye after that.
Story Credit: Reddit/Quailgirl
After receiving an internal exam from my GYN, He asked if he could bring a medical student in so they could get some “practice”. I agreed, thinking he meant “a” student. He took a good ten minutes, but after that, in walked a group of about 5 people, male and female. They each took turns examining me, then talking about me like I wasn’t there as they reported what they felt to my GYN “Syphilitic chancre?” “Cystocele?”
With his back turned to me, my GYN corrected them and told them exactly what they had been feeling. “She was born with ambiguous genitalia and had cosmetic feminization at two years of age, but the surgeon missed the internal structures”
And that’s how I discovered that I was born with both “organs” and my parents opted for me to have surgery as a toddler.
Story Credit: Reddit/mundabit
So on my OB/GYN rotation, I was the best speaking Vietnamese person on the team. We had a Vietnamese-speaking patient come in so it was my time to shine! Sadly, I did not realize I only know conversational Vietnamese, not medical.
I had to translate to the lady that her cystocele/prolapse was not bad and only needed monitoring. Not knowing how to say the word for a lady part in Vietnamese made this task really difficult. Apparently, I used the word for a male instead.
So, I basically misgendered a Female patient’s parts to her in Vietnamese and probably freaked her out completely because she kept looking down to see what was going on like I was saying she grew a new part or something. Yay me!
Story Credit: Reddit/Battle614
No Habla Ingles
Med student, soon-to-be intern here. I was on an ER rotation two months ago when this gem took place. I’m supposed to do a pelvic exam on a patient with abnormal bleeding when I find she only speaks Spanish. I had gone through my routine introducing myself in Spanish and using a translation phone to gather relevant history, but phones just aren’t available during the whole procedure, obviously.
Typically, you warn the patient about the pressure on the introitus; I did my best, but I didn’t know how to tell her to take a deep breath. I apologized for the pressure and thought I was saying thank you for your patience as I cleaned up. Apparently I was nervous and was instead repeating, in Spanish, “I am glad I am doing this” over and over again.
Yes, the nurse spoke Spanish and enjoyed reminding me about it later.
Story Credit: Reddit/RDthedo
The Daisy Cutter
As a teenager, I had a growth on my butt that dermatologists thought was malignant. They decide to do an in-office surgery. Surgery day rolls around, and I, as a female, didn’t know it was going to be carried out by a male doctor.
It was already awkward enough that I would have a man looking directly at my butt and other ladybits. Everything started out fine, and I was coming to terms with everything when it happened; the local anesthesia they injected into my butt was taking effect, and the doctor began cutting.
He’s talking to me the entire time and cracks a joke. I don’t remember the joke but because of the relaxation of muscles, I inadvertently let one rip, right in his face. He was very gracious about it, but it was still humiliating for a teenage girl.
Story Credit: Reddit/NOT_A_HORSE
“He Called Me A Woman”
An unconscious, intoxicated patient comes into the ER. One of the nurses that work there had just gone through a male-to-female transition surgery. While she and my mom were examining this patient, he came to for a brief moment long enough to get a hazy picture of what was going on.
He saw the transgender nurse, stared for a few seconds, and said “you’re the ugliest woman I have ever seen” then passed back out. The room went silent. The nurse then stepped back and everyone was bracing for tears when she shouted out “HE CALLED ME A WOMAN!”
She was so thrilled he acknowledged her woman, she never cared that he thought she was ugly.
Story Credit: Reddit/Deleted User
Shows Where His Mind Was
I am a female large-chested patient. In my twenties. My doctor was using a stethoscope and listening to my lungs, saying “take a big breath” then would move the stethoscope and say “ok now breathe normally.” He tells me to lie on my back and then he puts the stethoscope on my chest again.
I ask “are these big breaths or small breaths?”He turns beet red. He stutters and says, “uh…they look fine to me.” I say “No, I want to know what kind of BREATHS you want me to take so you can listen!”
Aaaaaaand I died on the inside.
Story Credit: Reddit/taratorial
Not My Proudest Moment
I had a similar situation. I was about 12 or 13 years old and just had my first training bra. I was sick and the doctor was listening to my lungs with the stethoscope. He says, ‘nice big breaths’.
The moment is already awkward enough. At that age, everything makes you feel conscious of yourself. But I made things worse by turning so red and saying “thank you”. My dad says, ‘No….he said BREATHS’.
It’s been ten years and my friends and family still recite this story.
Story Credit: Reddit/2moreSalts