All Trumped Up: 25 Ridiculous Quotes from Donald Trump

Donald Trump has been in the public eye for much of his career.  The real estate mogul has appeared in thirteen movies since 1989, did countless interviews promoting books, casinos, golf courses and the Miss Universe pageants.  He was a loved character though out much of his early career.  People liked his cocky, pompous attitude and sometimes ridiculous statements he made in public.

With the rise of social media, Donald Trump has taken full advantage of utilizing platforms to make statements.  His preferred social media platform for communication is Twitter.  His first tweet on May 4, 2009, was as boring and bland as any, “Be sure to tune in and watch Donald Trump on Late Night with David Letterman as he presents the Top Ten List tonight!”   But something changed two years later, his Tweet volume increased 4x in 2011.  It is believed that those tweets were no longer bland public relation director Tweets but from Trump himself.

On January 20, 2017,  Donald Trump was sworn in as the 45th President of the United States.   Now, those same cocky and sometimes ridiculous statements are made from the President of the United States.   And no matter what side of the political spectrum you sit on, there is no denying that Donald Trump’s tweet and comments sometimes serves a very real and legitimate purpose in our society; providing comedic fodder.

On response to global warming Trump stated, “It’s really cold outside, they are calling it a major freeze, weeks ahead of normal. Man, we could use a big fat dose of global warming!”

And that’s just the beginning of Trump’s seemingly endless supply of funny and sometimes insane quotes.   Read more ridiculous quotes from Donald Trump.

 

25.) Trump Invents New Word, “Covfefe”

 

 

 

 

“Despite the constant negative press covfefe”

What does that mean?  The message was removed 50 minutes later with no explanation.  But after hundreds of thousands of retweets “covfefe” lives on.

24.) Donald Trump on 60 minutes

“When I think I’m right, nothing bothers me” –

He said this in 1985 on the popular TV talk show 60 Minutes.  That explains a lot.

23.) Trump on Diet Coke

“I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.’

Yes, it is called Diet Coke for a reason. Trump tweeted this sarcasm-laced statement in 2012

22.) Trump on His IQ

“Sorry losers and haters, but my I.Q. is one of the highest – and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure, it’s not your fault.”

I don’t even know how to respond to this.

21.) Donald Trump on China

“Listen, you motherf@#$ers, we’re going to tax you 25 percent!”

Trump said this in a 2011 speech in Las Vegas.

20.) Donald Trump on Larry King

“Do you mind if I sit back a little? Because your breath is very bad — it really is”

Trump said this to Larry King on King’s show in 1989.

19.) Donald Trump on Jeb Bush

“Jeb Bush has to like the Mexican Illegals because of his wife.”

This was one of his controversial “tweets and delete” cases during his presidential campaign.

18.) Donald Trump on the Presidency

“I don’t want the Presidency. I’m going to help a lot of people with my foundation–and for me, the grass isn’t always greener.”

Trump made this statement during the signing of the vintage copy of Playboy featuring him alongside Brandi Brandt.

17.) Donald Trump on the Duchess of Cambridge

Here is a Tweet on the Duchess of Cambridge when pictures of her topless photos went viral

“Who wouldn’t take Kate’s picture and make lots of money if she does the nude sunbathing thing. Come on, Kate!’

She wasn’t the Duchess at the time, but she was still in the public eye at this point.

16.) Trump on Body Parts

“My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well documented, are various other parts of my body.”

Trump told this to Page Six in 2011.

15.) Trump on His Hair

‘The worst thing a man can do is go bald. Never let yourself go bald.’

Is going bald really the worst?

14.) Trump on Sex in the Media

 

 

 

“You know, it really doesn’t matter what they write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.”

In 1991, Donald Trump made this statement during an interview with Esquire magazine in response to negative media.

13.) Trump on Ebola

“Something very important, and indeed society-changing may come out of the Ebola epidemic that will be a very good thing: NO SHAKING HANDS!”

Ebola is not spread from shaking hands but I think someone is obsessed with hands.  Please refer to slide #16.

12.) Trump on Deflategate vs. Emailgate

“They had no definitive proof against Tom Brady or #patriots.  If Hillary doesn’t hove to produce Emails, why should Tom?  Very unfair!”

Both survived their scandal but only one is still winning.

11.) Trump on His Daughter Ivanka

 

“I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”

Yes, and the award for the best father goes to Mr. Trump.  This is one of the most cringe-worthy and ridiculous quotes from Donald Trump.

10.) Trump on Windmills vs Global Warming

“Windmills are the greatest threat in the US to both bald and golden eagles.  Media claims fictional ‘global warming’ is worse.”

The next time you see one of those deadly windmills, quietly turn and go the other way.  They will kill you.

9.) Trump on Humility

“I think I am actually humble. I think I’m much more humble than you would understand.”

What a paragon of virtue. We must have misunderstood his style of humility.

8.) Trump on His Humble Beginnings

He acknowledges this in the statement,

“My father gave me a small loan of a million dollars.”

We all love to be given a head start in any race, and Trump did get that head start, even though it was just a tiny little one.

7.) Trump on His Sex Life

Trump is also not afraid to talk about his sex life. He said this in an interview with Playboy magazine where he was asked about the sex-enhancing drug and whether he uses it:

“I think Viagra is wonderful if you need it if you have medical issues if you’ve had surgery. I’ve just never needed it. Frankly, I wouldn’t mind if there were an anti-Viagra, something with the opposite effect. I’m not bragging. I’m just lucky. I don’t need it. I’ve always said, ‘If you need Viagra, you’re probably with the wrong girl.”‘

6.) Trump vs. Cher

In one of his numerous altercations on twitter, this time with Cher (actress and musician) he tweeted this:

“I don’t wear a ‘rug’— it’s mine. And I promise not to talk about your massive plastic surgeries that didn’t work.”

5.) Trump on a Presidential Run

“I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I’m more honest, and my women are more beautiful.”

In establishing one’s self as a legitimate political candidate, it is important to come across as having honesty and integrity. Knowing that Trump assured potential voters that first and foremost, he is a more honest person than anyone else who would run. He also let them know that just in case they were wondering, he is TOTALLY killing it with the ladies. High Five!

4. Donald Trump Quotes on the Past

“In life you have to rely on the past, and that’s called history.”

Little known fact, there was actually not a name for it until Trump informed the world at large that it was called “history.” Before Trump, everybody just called it “that stuff that happened that one time.”

3.) Trump on Race Relations

“I have a great relationship with the blacks.”

Well, obviously. After all, if he didn’t, he wouldn’t be so aware of their secret preference to be collectively referred to as “the Blacks.”  But as we all know orange is the new black.

2.)Trump on Obama’s Birthplace

“I have people that have been studying [Obama’s birth certificate] and they cannot believe what they’re finding… I would like to have him show his birth certificate, and can I be honest with you, I hope he can.  Because if he can’t—if he can’t—if he wasn’t born in this country, which is a real possibility—then he has pulled one of the great cons in the history of politics.”

With this quote, Trump considers the serious possibility that Obama became the leader of the free world simply by being the craftiest grifter around.

1.) Trump on Gay Marriage

“It’s like in golf. A lot of people — I don’t want this to sound trivial — but a lot of people are switching to these really long putters, very unattractive. It’s weird. You see these great players with these really long putters because they can’t sink three-footers anymore. And, I hate it. I am a traditionalist. I have so many fabulous friends who happen to be gay, but I am a traditionalist.”

That’s right, he doesn’t want to make it sound trivial, but he could have just come out and said: “I believe marriage is between a rich guy and his much younger third wife.”

 

Want to read more quotes (but maybe less aggravating ones)? Click “Next” to read funny tweets about marriage.