5 Tom Brady
This New England Patriot quarterback’s 2008 season-ending ACL injury warranted stiffer roughing-the-passer penalties in 2009, during which they were more strictly enforced to his advantage, yet made him look oversensitive. NBC sports analyst and Brady’s former teammate Rodney Harrison even suggested that Brady “take off the skirt and put on some slacks.”
4 A-Rod and Ryan Braun
Both have been in the hot seat for steroids scandals and lit their pants on fire by lying and throwing pity parties. Ryan Braun, former National League MVP, was suspended from his post as Milwaukee Brewers outfielder for the remainder of the 2013 season, resulting from the Biogenesis investigation, and after several denials. Alex Rodriguez, the once top-paid MLB player and shortstop-turned-third baseman, came clean about his substance abuse as a Texas Ranger during his interview with Peter Gammons on ESPN in 2009. Will this New York Yankee go back into crybaby mode again this time?
3 Chad Johnson
The high-profile, above-the-radar NFL wide-receiver is always in the public eye, because he tweets compulsively, even during his 2010 search for a bride on VH1’s “Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch.” Thanks to his constant networking activity, his 2012 dramatic exposé of losing his Starbucks Gold Card among other belongings in a car theft led him to recovering all of his items except the card, which Starbucks replaced in the wake of the publicity. We fellow Starbucks Gold Card members can empathize with the former Ochocinco, because we consumed our share of coffee and “lemon loaves” to earn that status.
2 Miami Heat’s Big Three
The twice in-a-row NBA Finals Champions have a trio of divos on their hands: MVP LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh. Back in 2007, D-Wade suffered a shoulder injury so painful that he couldn’t resist legit tears and had to be removed from the court in a wheelchair. Nicki Minaj’s “Roman Unloaded” song bashes Boshie for breaking down after the Dallas Mavericks beat the Heat in the 2011 NBA Finals. Drama King LeBron has been a bad sport by complaining about calls and crying about defeat, but 2012 was his time to shine as NBA Finals and Team USA MVP. Together, this threesome’s blood, sweat and tears paid off, because they advanced all the way to world championship status and share the throne on the Hardwood Crybaby Court.
1 Terrell Owens
NFL free agent wide receiver Terrell Owens deserves the drama king crown and reigns on the “Professional Baller Bawler” throne. He has been seen openly weeping about former teammate, Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo, and personal reasons on VH1’s “The T.O. Show” for three seasons and “Dr. Phil.” When he defended his QB, he hid his eyes behind black shades, yet his shaky voice indicated his sentiment.